You know what you want. You have the desire to be successful, productive, healthy and happy. But why are you not taking action towards the things you desire? Are you self-sabotaging your life?
I’m no stranger to self-sabotage. Whether that presents itself in procrastination, putting other people first or falling victim to the dis-empowering voice in my head. There have been many times in my life where I’ve subconsciously (and even consciously), blocked my own success, happiness or health – despite my positive intentions. But why is that?
I believe the root cause of self-sabotage stems from fear. This fear makes you undermine your goals and values.
In my video, Is Fear of Success Holding You Back?, I talked about some of my own self-sabotaging behaviours and habits. And I’ll be honest, I still struggle with aspects of what I shared today. There may never be a time when I don’t get fearful when making changes to my life, but I have learned to not let it stop me.
So how do you stop yourself from self-sabotaging your life and not making progress on the things you want to achieve?
The first step is to become self-aware of the sabotaging mindset and habits that may be holding you back and then finding the right tools to break free of them.
Checkout the list of self-sabotaging behaviours below and think about how they show up in your own life – stopping you from living the life you truly desire.
Are you self-sabotaging your life?
(Make sure you check out the end of the post where I share how you can start to end the cycle of self-sabotage – feel the fear but do it anyway.)
- Resistance to change
- The desire to be perfect
- Fear of rejection
- Holding on to shame
- Identifying yourself as a victim
- Holding on to limiting beliefs
- Comparing yourself to others
- Chronic worrying
- Feeling unworthy
- Negative self talk
- Making Excuses
- Having a fixed mindset
- Suppressing emotions
- Feeling defensive
- Being emotionally dependant
- Criticising others
- Being busy
- Avoiding responsibility
- Unable to say ‘no’
- Compulsive behaviour
- Lack of self-discipline
- Not asking for help
- Giving up
- Not Starting
- Not saying what you want and need
- Seeking distractions
- Avoiding commitment
- Not taking care of yourself
- Performing below your capabilities
- Allowing others to make your decisions
Whether you identify with one or two things on the list or the majority of them, your own self-sabotage can have a disabling effect in the way you experience life and effect your own happiness. It’s so important to be self-aware of your own dis-empowering thoughts and behaviours and make a decision whether you will keep allowing them to dictate your life or take responsibility and no longer allow it to control you.
Keeping it real (which I always try to do!), some of the things we do to self-sabotage our life, may not go away completely. But I have found the best way to combat them is to focus on the life values I need to create the life I desire.
Creating empowering life values enabled me to:
- Have a ‘why’ more powerful than my self-sabotaging mindset and habits.
- Prioritised how I wanted to feel emotionally.
- Focused my attention on the outcome I want to feel.
- Plan my actions to enable this feeling.
- Create a life with less fear.
Leave a comment below and let me know which disempowering behaviour you are ready to give up today!